OK, I’m seriously going to start running & get fit. No, really, I’m serious. Really. Alright, you can stop now… really… stop… well at least put that cup of tea down before you start choking, or shoot it out of your nose or something. Seriously though, I mean it. I am determined to whip my fat ass into shape and find a way to de-stress at the same time.
Now, those of you who know me of old, will be more than aware of how badly P.E. & I got on at school – we were in no way the best of friends. I tended to get picked for things like the Long Jump at sports day, mainly on account of having had a growth spurt early on and being a 5ft 9ins tall 13-year old.
Most team sports and, well, really anything involving a modicum of coordination and/or speed, were just not something that I was very good at. I’d have been much happier working on some quadratic equations or making sure the books in the library were properly sorted in line with the Dewey Decimal system (I wish I was only joking about that last bit!).
The only sports I was any good at were Volleyball, again probably the tall factor kicking in and Trampolining. Not really sure why I was good at that one – I bounce well maybe?!
In addition to my lack of sporting prowess comes a sporadic form of ADD, which mainly kicks in when I go into a gym (a bit like Tourettes when I’m driving). I’m sorry, but fuck me but gyms are BOOOOOORRRING! I walk into one and instantly I can feel my mind becoming restless straight away. 15 minutes on a cross trainer has got to be the equivalent of a temporary frontal lobotomy – drop a section of your brain off at the desk when you pick up your towel maybe?
Well, we’ve established that I’m a raging geek and an impatient one at that, but the fact remains that I need to get fit. And I sure as shit, need to find a way to destress, with the maelstrom of thoughts that are racing through my head at any one time. S0, here goes.
Serious running is the order of the day and who knows, there may even come a time when I can run further than the end of the road without either a) coughing up a lung or b) pretending not to be in quite as much discomfort when cute (and much fitter) boy zooms past me?
Until then, I’m going to crack on and get some miles under my belt, all the while dreaming of a day when I can run for aaaaages with the greatest of ease and also figure out a running outfit that makes it OK for me to wear my American Apparel knee-high socks in public…
…which may or may not be my real excuse for taking up running. Don’t ask me why, but I’m a total sucker for knee-high socks!